sometimes you just want to sit on the couch

Well, I have officially over-whelmed myself.
This was supposed to be the schedule of my day
Friday:
Go to work
Go to print club and take slides
Go to print club and conduct meeting
Go to print club and help clean the studio
Go down town to pick up fabric and pattern for my sewing class
Go to my sewing class
Go and meet up with friends at a bar
Go clean my apartment sometime during this
Go work on my drawing

What am I doing?

I was asked yesterday while talking on the telephone... "why did you hesitate to tell me where you have decided to apply to grad school."
I hesitate doing anything regarding grad school.
I just don't think I am good enough. That is what creates the pause in any conversation about it.
The school I am interested is competitive. Will I be one of the 6-8 people they consider letting in?
The city I am not terribly excited about, but the school I have fell in love with.
The big thing is if I stay in Philadelphia, I will not grow as a person or an artist.

I consistently feel like investing my time in other people is always better then investing time in myself.
Whew. That is kind of sad.

Well I am sure some time will free up
I have only decided to start painting classes to teach my friends how to paint (which is actually exciting)
Start another writing group with Kelly
Start an etching class on Tue and Thur
Have two art shows
Volunteer at Fleisher
Host dinner parties on Thur...

hahaha
I must love not having time to breathe